Men and women alike, going through divorce, would like to believe that they can make good decisions in the divorce process. In fact, I am confident that most professionals with whom the client interacts, would like to be more effective in helping their clients make better decisions. But lots of circumstances get in the way of that: an enormous number of changes, riding the emotional rollercoaster, and participating in a legal process that most divorce clients don’t fully grasp.
And to make matters worse, one of the parties may be feeling frustration, anger and guilt and is ready to move forward with a new start; while the other spouse is shocked, devastated by the suddenness and finality of the decision they had no part in. Not a sound recipe for good decisions on either side!
If only you had a magic wand and could help your client to make better decisions. The keys to all of this is to out-maneuver the reptilian brain. You know that old part of the brain that is responsible for our survival, first as a species and now as a social system. Your reptilian brain is very capable of fighting, fleeing, and freezing but putting the demands of rational decision-making on your client when that part of the brain has been blocked flies in the face of reason!
With your ability to listen and believe in your client, you can help them to:
- Consciously align with their values.
- Own your desired outcomes AND accept the Consequences.
- Be willing to make Concessions with a focus on what is most important to your client ;
- Confirm and validate whatever information they are working with; and
- Clarify their understanding of the most likely outcomes.
Easier said than done, right? How do you build the bridge between the survival brain and the thinking brain when the client’s world has been toppled and they are desperately trying to get through the next day, week or month?
FOCUS is the answer. But I don’t want to give away everything we are going to share with you in the upcoming Free Training Webinar we are offering Nov 30 at 1 pm ET and Dec 3 at 5 pm ET – we offer to help people like yourself help the client make the best possible decisions for their future based on their interest needs and concerns! What you will take away from this interactive webinar is an easy to remember approach to helping the client to engage more effectively in the decision-making process and increase the probability of a favorable outcome.
What Success Looks Like in Divorce Coaching
When people hear the word success, they often think about outcomes. Did you get what you wanted? Did the negotiation go your way? Did you reach the agreement you hoped for? During divorce, those questions can feel particularly important. There may be decisions about...
One Training. Two Credentials. Expanding the Possibilities of Dispute Resolution Coaching
For more than a decade, divorce coaching has helped change the way individuals experience one of life's most challenging transitions. And the skills that help someone navigate divorce—communicating more effectively, clarifying interests and needs, preparing for...
Networking Strategies for Divorce Coaches: Building Relationships That Matter
When many people hear the word networking, they picture crowded conferences, awkward introductions, and collecting business cards. In reality, successful networking looks very different. For divorce coaches, networking is not about meeting the most people. It is about...
