1. You are the one who benefits most from taking the “High Road”!
Have you ever noticed how toxic and painful it is to lock horns with someone? When it happens in our household even my cats gets agitated and goes around in circles meowing in a very stressed out tone. Imagine the impact on you and your ability to generate the energy you need to be your best during this stressful time! Almost impossible!
2. Find Creative Ways to Blow off Steam!
I read a blog post today about a Mom who kept telling her kids they couldn’t go to Disney World because they didn’t have any money. And then she discovered at the grocery store those little car carts for kids which her two girls squeezed into with great enthusiasm! She realized that for them it was like a ride at Disney World and she spent the next 45 minutes pushing them around the almost empty parking lot – getting rid of her pent up emotions and giving her girls the gifts of delight!
3. Seek out help from others and reciprocate.
Ask for support when you need it – even if it is doing something you could do alone but just don’t want to! And don’t feel guilty – just grateful. When it is done, kick your feet up, share a cup of tea or coffee with your helper and find out what they need in the way of support. Mutual benefit feels so good and can replenish your reserves.
4. Be Patient.
Recognize that the other person engaged in this divorce process with you started the process of divorce at a different time than you did! Maybe you have been going through the process of separating for months or years, and they just started their journey. Or maybe it is the other way around. Give you or them the time to go through the grieving process before you start making decisions.
5. Keep the picture of YOU at Your Best in front of you!
Get present to who you are when you at your best and acknowledge when fall off the path! Your best self makes better decisions, shows up differently, and allows others to maintain their dignity. You don’t have to be “nice” to have embrace your values and stay true to yourself. And when you are in conflict with you at your best, your worst comes out!